AMCAS Personal Statement: My Best Tips for Writing It

AMCAS Personal Statement Example #1

916 words (5,181 of the maximum 5,300 characters with spaces)

My mother grew up as one of 14 children in a very poor home in rural Ontario, where both parents, while loving and warm, suffered from alcoholism. She and her siblings experienced significant childhood adversity, the legacy of which still looms large. Later, as the matriarch of her own family, she ran a small business, supported my aunts, uncles, and cousins, and provided stability for all of us. She modelled, and I internalized, compassion for my loved ones as they lived through uncertainty, conflict, illness, and loss.

You might wonder why I tell my mother’s story, rather than my own. I could say that my mother inspired me to go into medicine and leave it at that. However, to call it inspiration would be a discredit to the profound influence my mother has had on my life and the lives of everyone around us.

They say, “it takes a village,” but my family basically made up half the village where I lived. I’m exaggerating, but it’s almost true. In such an isolated place, the few families that existed formed a close, interdependent community. When someone fell ill, it was often the family who stepped in, since the nearest clinic was 40 minutes away.

That is not to say we were completely helpless. We had a doctor who actually did house calls for many years. It wasn’t always the same doctor, but the service was set up to come to us. These doctors in my family’s story buffered the effects of poverty and social exclusion. For example, when my uncle Elvin was dying of liver cancer, our family doctor regularly stopped by our house to manage his palliative care, even as he continued to drink alcohol. I still recall how the doctor treated him with such humanity and with full recognition of his life arc.

You will have noticed that I said, “our house,” which is where my mother comes in again. Indeed, when her brother got sick, there was no question of where he would stay or who would look after him. He was not alone; my mother was already looking after her ailing father and several young children. Moreover, before my uncle Elvin arrived, she had offered our neighbor’s son, who was studying to be a nurse, a job. She didn’t stop there. Those of us siblings who were old enough to take on greater responsibility were assigned new tasks: more cleaning, more cooking, more laundry.

With dozens of relatives who could potentially drop in at any moment, our home had never been empty or quiet, so at first, I didn’t notice the change. Gradually, however, the house was transformed. As my uncle’s condition and that of my grandfather grew more serious, we had more visiting physicians and twice the number of nurses. Someone was always knocking into someone else with a basket of laundry, and everything smelled like disinfectant.

This state of affairs eventually prompted the oncologist to suggest a more private arrangement for our two patients, but my mother had insisted that they would stay in their rooms, on the first floor, where they were comfortable and where no one was ever too far away. There was something about the matter of fact approach my mother took to the reality of having sick people in her home that impressed me. In her mind, it felt perfectly normal, and even to be expected, that they would remain with us, as part of the family, until the end. And although I wasn’t given a choice about it – and maybe even because I was given no choice – my mother’s decision made perfect sense to me and even reassured me. As she argued for the security of her “patients,” she made us feel more secure ourselves as kids.

I won’t lie, there were many difficult moments after that, and we couldn’t have done it without the visiting health care team, but the year my mother ventured into hospice care changed the course of my life, as I am sure you have gathered by now. As I embarked on my undergrad in social sciences, I was certain I wanted to follow my mother’s example of community care, but all my extracurricular interests have centered around health care. I have volunteered in other nursing homes – not my own – and served as an intake worker at a local rehabilitation day center, registering clients for their medication. These and other similar positions have only confirmed my attraction to the field of medicine.

I’m seriously considering family medicine because I appreciate that patients’ social, economic, and biological narratives are critical to their primary care experiences. Family medicine is where the lives of patients are wholly expressed. However, I’m equally interested in oncology because I witnessed first-hand how these specialists work to improve treatment, alleviate suffering, prolong life, and enhance quality of life.

What I am certain of is that I want to be of direct, longitudinal service to my community through innovative and solutions-oriented work that helps people live well – in other words, I want to be just like my mother. At the core of my service vision is health equity, or the elimination of avoidable, unfair differences in health status experienced by different groups. My dedication to health equity is clearly reflected in my academic and work life, but it is rooted in the lived experiences of my family.

AMCAS Personal Statement: Advice from Real MDs

 On how to stand out in your personal statement:

“The personal statement is an opportunity for you to shine and really impress the committee to invite you for an interview. In order to stand out, it is important to answer the main questions well: a bit about yourself and what led you to medicine, why you would make an ideal medical student and future physician, what attracts you to this particular institution, and what sets you apart from the other candidates.” - Dr. Neel Mistry, MD

“What I did was start with a story. Like any good novel, the stories first lines are meant to hook the reader. This can be about anything if you can bring it back and relate it to your application... It is important that the story be REAL... While in my opinion it is OK to slightly embellish some details of story to make it more interesting, straight lying or overly unrealistic situations should be avoided.” - Dr. Jamie Cazes, MD

“I focused on my journey to medicine and opportunities that I sought out along the way. Everyone’s path and validation is unique, so walking the reader through your growth to the point of application will naturally be different.” - Dr. Monica Taneja, MD

My Best AMCAS Personal Statement Tips

Tip #1: Get an Early Start!

I went the “last minute route” which I DO NOT recommend. I took my MCAT in early May, and in the process of waiting for my score to be released, I began writing my personal statement. About 2-3 weeks sounds like it would be plenty of time to write but taking into consideration writing your AMCAS activities section while also requesting transcripts and letters of recommendation, due dates can come up quick! I highly DO NOT recommend going this route unless you enjoy unnecessary stress and potentially decreasing the quality of your personal statement.

A realistic timeline for writing your AMCAS personal statement will look like this:

1. 6 months prior to the AMCAS opening date, start brainstorming and reflecting on your experiences to get an idea of what you want your AMCAS personal statement to look like and pinpoint experiences that are truly convincing and authentic.
2. 5-6 months prior to the opening date, begin an outline/rough draft of the ideas comprised and start piecing everything together. Decide what will go in your introduction, body, and conclusion paragraphs. At this point, start having someone look over your paper, either a trusted friend or mentor or a professional such as a med school admissions advisor.
3. 1 month prior to the opening date, have a final draft ready to allow time to complete other aspects of your application.  

Tip #2: The Essay Is a Story, not a Resume

You want to captivate your reader’s attention from the beginning to keep them engaged throughout the rest of your personal statement. When writing my personal statement, I described falling backwards and having glass shatter on my face, requiring a trip to the emergency department and my first encounter with a physician. I used this story to give my reader an example of what my first memory was when interacting with the medical system and begin giving them a glimpse of my story in medicine. 

Introduction

The introduction is arguably the most important aspect of your paper, so use it to immerse your reader into your story right away:

Body Paragraphs

In your body paragraphs, you want to give your reader a “roadmap” as to what you are going to discuss in the body of your personal statement (essentially, the topics you are to discuss in the body paragraphs). This is done to give your reader a clear idea of what they are about to read.

The body of your personal statement is where you discuss 2-3 personal experiences that have helped drive you to pursue medicine. For example, my 2 experiences consisted of talking about a family member who suffered from cancer and my time in Haiti providing care for the rural Haitian people. When describing these experiences, you want to paint a specific story (a patient interaction, for example) to make it more personable and “show” instead of “telling” what you did. Additionally, you want to make sure you discuss what you learned from the experience and how it convinced you to pursue medicine.

Conclusion

Lastly, you want to wrap up your paper by bringing up all of your experiences and briefly touching upon their learning points and how you will use those experiences to be a good physician in the future. You can also call back to the experience/topic you brought up in your introduction to make the conclusion connect to your introduction. This will help wrap up your paper nicely and bring everything together for your reader.

Tip #3: How to Write Without a Prompt

It’s always easier to write an essay if someone assigns you the topic. For instance, maybe you had to research diversity and inclusion in medical education at some point and think you know the “secret” to writing an excellent diversity secondary essay. But what do you do when there is no prompt – or the topic is you? Where do you start? How do you choose? What do medical schools want to hear? How do you come across as unique when the purpose of the essay is so generic?

When brainstorming through all of your previous experiences, there are the straightforward ones that make sense, such as shadowing, clinical and volunteer work, and research. When I began brainstorming for my AMCAS personal statement, I used my running document of all of the undergraduate medicine or science related experiences I had since starting college . But I also did some self-reflection on any medically related experiences I had growing up in terms of my own run-ins with medicine, as well as family medical experiences that I thought were worth mentioning.

In my AMCAS personal statement, I highlighted my experience as a patient, what my immigrant parents experienced in the healthcare system, and my involvement in translating for a free clinic focused on Spanish-speaking patients. I chose these experiences as they were the easiest to explain and talk about; they truly were part of my passion in trying to improve healthcare for people with a similar background to me.

My number one recommendation for choosing topics to discuss in your personal statement is to choose stories that show your passion. The main purpose of the AMCAS personal statement is to convince the admissions committee that there is nothing else you would rather do then to study medicine. 

Do you need inspiration for your AMCAS personal statement? Check out this video with examples:

Tip #4: Remember that Writing Is a Craft

The challenges I had with writing my personal statement are likely similar to the challenges you will face when writing yours. My drafting experience was a bit rough as I am not the strongest writer. I had a lot of help from friends, family, and professors who I trusted. Writing your AMCAS personal statement may take more than 2-3 drafts (mine took about 10 drafts), so be patient with yourself! It is completely okay to re-write a paragraph or even your whole personal statement to get it to where you want it to be (this is why I recommend starting your rough draft six months to a year before your application is due).

Usually, I made one small edit, sent it out to people, and received 10+ recommendations for change. At times, it was hard to keep track of all of the recommendations as at times I would receive conflicting recommendations. Looking back, I wish I had services to help with narrowing down what aspects of my personal statement truly needed to be changed and which are okay to keep.

Become a good – even great – writer in the process of applying to medical school, and you can rest easy that you’ve given this particular part of your application your best shot.

Getting behind the idea of creative writing may not appeal to science majors, but believe me, it’s a skill that will serve you in medicine in more ways than you can imagine. However, it may seem like just another chore to get out of the way. If that’s your mindset, you should change it – because your AMCAS personal statement is a real opportunity to reflect on and distill your passion for medicine.

And why not take advantage of our free offer to acquire BeMo’s Ultimate Guide to Medical School Personal Statements & Secondary Essays? This 300-page guide with tips, strategies, and sample successful personal statements promises to “help you learn to write captivating essays, even if you are not a natural writer.”

Tip #5: Get Expert Feedback

Like I described above, getting recommendations from multiple people that were conflicting made it difficult to focus on the aspects of my personal statement that truly needed revising as I would spend too much time focusing on the minor details that may or may not improve my paper. Get an expert second set of eyes to look at your AMCAS personal statement draft and provide you with objective feedback.

The reality is that every great writer has an editor, and you will need one. Given the importance of the AMCAS personal statement, there’s really no reason not to consider medical school personal statement editing services to help you out. There’s no question that a medical school application tutor is worth it to radically improve your personal statement and other components that can highly influence your admission chances.

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To your success,

Your friends at BeMo

BeMo Academic Consulting

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